The "Trash Panic" of Moving
thoughts and feels on instant cheap thrills, thoughtless consumption, and creature comforts to get you through the "in-between" of settling in
I’m back, bitches! And oh, how I missed you!
I wish I would have had my poop in a group to do more festively fun Valentine’s Day curation and commentary because I love LOVE but alas, I do not. BUT the great thing about L-O-V-E is that you can celebrate it any day all day every day so maybe just maybe I’ll make a round-up dedicated to it in the next few weeks. You can also check out last month’s volume of “The Dump” for some “search bar” inspiration and sexy finds.
My brain may still be stress soup as I wade amongst a sea of boxes, but I am slowly feeling my overwhelmed blob body become slightly more human as the dust of this new chapter begins to settle. Now if only my hair would stop falling out in large clumps…
We’ve successfully made it to our new home in Minnesota and the past week of my life has been filled with unpacking, scrubbing walls, and organizing a giant spreadsheet of “to dos” for our new home. Being an anxious perfectionist, I am consistently fighting the urge to want to do every task, chore, and project all at once — the phrase “there are not enough hours in the day” haunts my inner most thoughts as I look around our 1953 home and see nothing but holes that need to be spackled and baseboards that need to be replaced.
I am most definitely actively fighting the anxiety that the internet has built around being “done” “complete” “perfectly curated'“ and “moved in” despite how much I preach about campaigning against the algorithmic ways in which Instagram loves to taunt us with those graceful, elegant, effortless million dollar home makeovers filled with lies, lies, lies and money, money, money. The entire basement level of our home is not only empty, but looks like an office building circa 1977, complete with dingy acoustic drop ceilings and flickering fluorescent lights and I feel this intense pressure to have it look perfectly plucked out of my Pinterest moodboards by next Tuesday!! But that costs money!! And takes time!!
May this space be a support group for all us who took that other fork in the road, the one filled with potholes, that twists, turns, bends, weaves, and enjoy the chaotic adventure while we’re on it. When I left my corporate job, I knew that meant embracing that all the “wants” were going to be a little harder to reach, and take time and patience to procure. In the one click, add to cart, “look at what that popular person on Instagram has” eco-system, it’s double the gut check to pause and be okay with being grateful for what I have in the here and now. Living to have things complete never brings the joy we think it will, and certainly doesn’t lend to learning, a human experience I find is becoming extinct as we drown ourselves in screen time and scrolling.
Learning comes from being thick in the “in-between” — the unknown, the ick, yuck, weird. I can attest it makes everything feel sweeter/tender/intimate in the end, even if the discomfort of trudging through the peanut butter fields of “gaining wisdom” really blows. Fuck the short cut that is curated feeds of perfection and completeness, I say!
(If you need a visual reminder that the good stuff takes time, follow DK Dreamhouse on TikTok. Katie and David are a couple living in the PNW and renovating a 1940s home that was owned by hoarders. Following along has been a gentle reminder of how doing something “right” and “complete” takes time - success loves preparation! )
On the topic of short cuts and quick fixes, moving was an ugly reminder of how deeply far gone we are in treating this tiny baby precious planet with warm, tender, L-O-V-E! From exorbitant amounts of bubble and plastic wrap, to the carbon footprint of moving/shipping things, to sifting through your possessions/selling/shopping for forever furniture, the state of the world has never looked so bleak. Part of the prickles and tingles of anxiousness living in my body has been the Trash Panic of realizing how much garbage trash nastiness is floating around this planet from people moving, doing cheap/poorly executed remodels, and over consuming crappy furniture that isn’t meant to last even the current trend cycle. I’ve spent the last few days organizing trash bags of paper and gently folding down boxes in hopes someone on FB Marketplace wants to reuse them for their own move. The amount of bubble wrap used to simply store things a container for a month makes me feel ill just looking at it!!
I saw someone make a video about how in only a few decades, the landscape of estate sales will drastically shift, the possessions of people from our generation will severely lack curb appeal, let alone last the next 100 years like so much of the furniture and home goods from the 100 years before us. No one will be lining up at 5am to explore a home filled with cheap particle board cabinets and mass produced sofas and chairs! Quality is at all time low, prices nearing a ridiculous high, and the morale of making any space feel like home at rock bottom. I am le tired.
I’ve waxed poetic before about buying for what we want, and not for the unsexy bland boring resale value of a grey box home and the gospel according to Zillow, and yet the day after we signed, sealed, and closed on our Austin home, I found myself trying to sell 85% of our furniture because all of it felt like a means to end, and not like “forever.” While I’m happy most of it made it into the homes of people who will love and snuggle it for years to come, it made me want to spend even more time focusing on what it is that I want for our new space, where it can mold and shift with not only our tastes, but comfortably breathe as the walls of this space inhale and exhale through the next chapters of life.
Though vintage styles, aesthetics, shapes, builds, etc have always been something I lean towards, I’m a millennial consumer that gets suckered into the trend cycles, sponsored ads, and inescapable pushes for sameness just like anyone else scrolling the world wide web. From checkers to squiggles, I have pinned and pined for trendy pieces that I know I won’t love in a year, let alone in 10. We all remember chevron stripes, right? Sitting with our ideas instead of immediately purchasing helps us to realize what is really “us” and what is just a really good targeted ad!
The process of moodboarding and gathering desired vibes for our new space has just begun (a sneak peek on that next week!) and I’m trying to consciously take the time to dig deep and find inspiration that comes from things we are living, breathing, and experiencing. An old book, a vintage matchbook, the painting at the new art exhibit, the striped garbage can at the local greek restaurant - inspiration. is. everywhere!! We are entering our “buying with purpose” era!! I know I want this space to be at least 85% vintage, secondhand, and pre-loved, which means even more time and patience in hunting for the right thing, restoring the old thing, and collecting those significantly insignificant tchotchkes that reflect our personalities, travels, and interests.
We can learn to be okay with incomplete, imperfect, undone, but that doesn’t mean we can’t treat ourselves in the mean time! Creature comforts are a vessel, the way through, in which we can find joy in the little things, remember who we are and have something to center us amongst the chaos of transition. I’ve opened a few boxes this week and rediscovered trinkets I haven’t seen in a month and immediately felt the pitter pat spark of joy from being reunited with the small, inconsequential things that make my mushy gushy insides sing.
So here is a little round up of small luxuries, tiny treasures, and a few new splurges that have made me feel settled in an unsettling time - maybe they can do the same for you!
Tekla Bath Robe - Is it expensive? Yes. Is it super cozy and you never want to take it off? Also yes. The perfect luxury when your closet is still packed, there’s laundry to do, and the motivation to put on hard pants is nonexistent.
Dedcool Laundry Detergent - I know everyone says that we should really be using scentless detergent but I also believe there’s about 5000000 other things I put my body through as an American that isn’t remotely healthy, so fuck it, I want my laundry to smell sexy and clean!
Vintage Wool Blanket - In an effort to not spend a fortune on heating our decently empty house, we’ve kept the thermostat at a reasonable number in the 60s and have invested in some cozy wool blankets for our bed and couch.
Aesop Resurrection Aromatique Hand Balm - Tis winter and the air is dry and so are my crusty hands. This hand balm is not only a miracle worker, but smells like heaven.
Vintage Stone Soap Dish - My bathroom may have every single toiletry and toilet paper roll sitting on the counter, but it all fades away when I look at our cute vintage soap dish. I love this one and am debating it, so snatch it up before I do!
Vintage Brass Bathtub Soap Dish - Or if you’re not sick of Saltburn discourse, go for the bathtub…
Vintage English Teacup Set - Nothing says, I’m not phased by the chaos of boxes in the kitchen like sipping your afternoon tea like royalty out of a fancy cup.
Vintage Hanging Strawberry Salt and Pepper Shakers - The same sentiment goes for cooking dinner and using these adorable hanging S+P shakers.
Flowerhead Tea “Double Mint Rose” - Everything Flowerhead Tea does is tasty magic and the packaging is a DREAM!
Vintage Alessi Tea Kettle - Stove eye candy and the vessel of must have afternoon caffeine.
Vintage Striped Pajamas - Vintage men’s pajamas are the move for ultimate comfort while still feeling like a classy person who has their shit together.
Well, there ya have it. I’ll be back on Friday with a new Curiosity Dispatch as well as a special weekend Trash Panic filled with finds I’ve sleuthed for you from comments, emails, and DMs I’ve received - so let me know what vintage, secondhand and pre-loved things you’re on the hunt for and I’ll round up some finds for you!
And because I love a good playlist, some tunes for you on this day of celebrating love✨
Until next time,
xo,
G
This made me cry. Thank you!